NAMED AND SHAMED ONLINE. HELP!
Well, this article could not be more timely after last night’s episode of Q&A!
The online world is alight with comment on the behaviour of MP Sophie Mirabella and her reaction to the on-air collapse of fellow panellist Simon Sheikh from Get Up!
Ms Mirabella has been roundly criticised for her lack of response. Did you join the commentariat? What do you think of the criticism?
Dr Samantha Thomas wrote this yesterday, before the program aired…

How many of us use social media – blogs, Twitter or Facebook – and have experienced or witnessed online trolling (inflammatory comments), flaming (verbal attacks) or bullying (repeated and sustained attacks)?
I’m guessing a lot.
But how many of us have ever responded to that sort of behaviour? Or stepped in to back up a friend or ‘follower’ that we know is being given a hard time online?
I suspect everyone will have stuck up for someone, or themselves, at least once. But most of the time we stay silent. We privately sympathise with the victim, but leave it to someone else to back them up publicly.
Just like in the ‘real’ world it is easier to brush it off as someone else’s business and to grumble that some people are just idiots or jerks. Maybe the online and often-anonymous nature of social media also makes it difficult for people to judge when to step in and act.
Is it a troll? A bully? A flamer? Or just someone with a fiercely passionate opinion? And how do you know that they won’t turn that behaviour towards you?
Social media allows us to instantaneously express opinions about a range of different topics – some more sensitive than others. Yet few of us know the backgrounds or experiences of the people we are conversing with.
And let’s be honest. It’s not just footballers who tweet before they think.
Last time I checked, not a lot of people were joining Twitter, disclosing their Myers Briggs score and then writing a list of all the issues that they found emotionally triggering or too sensitive to discuss.
So is it unsurprising that communication can get hopelessly muddled when “Person A” holds a steadfast and passionate view about an issue that “Person B” can hardly bring themselves to discuss?
Do we just block, ignore and carry on if someone offends us on the web?
Or should we start to take a more collective stand against certain types of behaviour? If we do take a stand, are we just being ‘precious’ about the realities of our new online environments?
Like the real world, the online world contains all sorts of different individuals with many different ways of expressing their views.
Cyberbullying is broadly defined as the use of information technologies to “support deliberate, repeated, and hostile behaviour by an individual or group, that is intended to harm others”.
While disproportionate power relationships are at the heart of any form of bullying or online attack, it has become all too easy to hide behind the web as a way of justifying some pretty poor behaviour.
Just because someone has a lot of followers on Twitter or has a popular website or blog, it does not entitle them to treat people shabbily and use others’ responses for “click bait”.
For some people, the web is their only interaction with the wider world. Being named and shamed online, or having their comment trashed, is absolutely shattering for them.
What was it Spiderman said? “With great power comes great responsibility”.
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35 Responses to this article
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dramaqueen75 July 3, 2012
Very timely article Samantha. I am a teacher working on a Cyber Safety and Anti Bullying program at the moment.
Looking through the program outcomes yesterday I discussed with a colleague the irony that we expect so much of our students in regard to their online behaviour, yet it is highly likely that their own parents behave appallingly and have very little “Netiquette”.
A few minutes looking through the comments on the SMH site, Mammamia or even, sadly, sometimes here on the Hoopla, reveal that many people seem to get a power kick or buzz from being nasty online. There has been a bit of research into this phenomena- the online disinhibition effect.
I used to have a group of friends I chatted to daily online. Somehow along the way a few people became a bit aggressive- whether they intended to be confrontational or if it was accidental ( a person’s “tone” is so hard to convey when the only communication tool we have is the written word). In the end the group just didn’t feel as friendly any more and we disbanded.
I do believe we should always back people up if they have been attacked unfairly – whether that be in person or online. I also think it is important for people to have integrity online – I use the same login on every forum I write on and I am aware that even though I have a tiny online presence I wan’t it to be an authentic one that represents the real me.
I noticed once that someone had made a nasty comment and tried to use my online moniker. I had a choice- would I flag it to the website moderator or ignore it. I had a suspicion who the person was who had done it and I decided to ignore – sometimes bully’s get a buzz from thinking they have upset you and it’s advisable to let things slide. Sometimes you need to fight back. You need to know the nature of your bully / troll before you can decide which strategy to apply – and that is not easy in the anonymous world online.
Just a few thoughts
I
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dramaqueen75 July 3, 2012
I was sent a link to this wonderful film made by some students in Wollongong. Well worth the 4 minutes of time to learn how online bullying can hurt and how we can fight back
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dramaqueen75 July 3, 2012
Sorry, the link didn’t post. I will try again – if it doesn’t work go to Youtube and search Stand Up, Stand Strong: The Consequence of Words.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYYSFpFGRBE&feature=player_embedded
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Mrs Woog July 3, 2012
I see it happening about me from time to time. Twitter is fab but it can be fairly foul as well. The worst I block, but the rest I tend to just shake it off.
More importantly though, it has made me check my own comments and tweets.
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Samantha July 3, 2012
I was really surprised at how intense the flaming of Mirabella was last night. Did she really deserve that? We might not like her politics but wow that was intense.
I was trolled for about 6 weeks by someone very recently. I blocked and reported him but still knew the comments were continuing.
It really helped that people sent me messages of support. Some were more proactive and took screenshots and sent them to someone who eventually made him stop. I was really grateful that they backed me up!
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Mumo2 July 3, 2012
Absolutely! All very well said, Dr Samantha and comment makers. There is also a tendency for bullies to excuse themselves using ‘passion’ as an excuse for outright nasty behaviour and repeated attacks, especially when discussing controversial or polarising topics. Words stick, people hurt. But its supposed to be ‘ok’ as we all know they are really ‘passionate’ about it…And yep its all in the modelling. I’m not religious, but the notion of something like ‘do unto others as you would have them do unto you’ is a value I want my children and community to hold onto to. On the web and in real life.
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Vicki July 3, 2012
Rather than diss Sophie about her reaction (who knows how we react in shock and confusion) but we should focus on the kindness, concern and quick reaction from Greg Combet who was speaking at the time. In an instant we saw the human face of a Politician.
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Leesa July 3, 2012
online or offline we see adults constantly bullying. Last week I wrote a short post about how we waste our time educating our kids whilst we behave the way we do. I’m not a very good writer but I think the point it essential;
http://leesis.wordpress.com/2012/06/22/teaching-our-kids-to-be-bullies/ -
Panda July 3, 2012
I am a member of an industry site and regularly comment on articles (anonymously, as per here at The Hoopla). Recently I (uncharacteristically) made fervent comments on an article (fairly in keeping with the tone of most other comments mind you) and was ‘flamed’ by another user. I was amazed at how shocked I felt personally. Fortunately, the next comment down was defending me, which made me feel much better! I already know to take online comments with a grain of salt, and to put on my thick skin if I”m going to participate, however I was still affected by the sheer vehemence of the personal attack on me, someone who had no idea who I was, made huge assumptions about my personal ‘agenda’ and even my gender. All from a few dozen words of comment on an article. It’s amazing how quickly things disintegrate into verbal slanging matches between users as they try to one-up each other. In this case I ignored the commenter, but it was made much easier for me to do so because of the defence of a third (also anonymous) party. I too have attempted to defend a more courteous standard of discourse on this industry site, by encouraging people to stay on topic and ‘play the ball, not the man’. I think the subject of how we as adults set examples and moderate each other is a worthy topic of discussion.
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sami July 3, 2012
I don’t think anyone should be judging Sophie on her reaction on Q&A. Some people freeze up in an emergency and some spring into action, it’s the fight or flight response I guess. She is probably a ‘freezer’. Can’t change that about someone and making her feel like crap wouldn’t be helping her.
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Kay July 3, 2012
Nobody knows how they will react to unexpected, often unpleasant, circumstances until placed in that position. Criticise Sophie at your peril. Today she is probably beating herself up over the things she could have done, given the benefit of hindsight. Having said that, I am no Sophie fan and I do think she has an often warped view of life.
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Kate S. July 3, 2012
I’ve been involved in ‘social media’ since 2002, although the term was not used then and things like Twitter did not have the popularity of today. I’ve seen the best and worst of social media.
Now I’m at the stage where I observe and make decisions about what social media has to offer and to what extent I need to get involved. But I’m an older person and can do that. My heart goes out to very young people or those new to the whole thing who can’t make those kinds of judgements yet and are sometimes victimized or horrified by what happens.
I don’t think the social media pummelling of Sophie Mirabella was justified. Another term for it is ‘mobbing’. It is unintelligent and cruel.
Nor do I like the new Twitter contributions to shows like QANDA and the Voice. It’ s distracting to those who want to listen and watch and a lazy way to make a point. I think that TV is capitulating to sensationalism by allowing that kind of feedback and was disappointed when the ABC started doing it.
We can’t protect people from everything but I try to intervene where appropriate. People have done that for me, and it’s been appreciated.
Social media can offer real benefits. We just have to be discerning in how we access these.
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Rachel ward July 3, 2012
Actors/artists have had to tolerate this kind of abuse from so ‘critics ‘ (media bullies??) their entire professional lives. not fun is it?
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Kate S July 3, 2012
I think the pummelling of Sophie Mirabella by Twitter was was unnecessary. Another term for it is ‘mobbing’. It is unintelligent and cruel.
Social media enables anonymous or fly-by-night bullying and there are very few effective controls
After a while you need to become discerning about how you use social media.. I wish shows like QANDA hadn’t given in to the pressure to use it.
I find it distracting when I’d prefer to listen and observe the person speaking. It’s got to the stage where I no longer watch shows that allow constant twittering. I watched last night simply because I’d been watching Four Corners and Media Watch before hand and was too tired to go to bed
Thank God radio doesn’t yet have social media (touch wood). It has become my preferred source of information now.
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Kate S July 3, 2012
Sorry about the duplicate messages. They didn’t appear immediately so I rewrote and reposted. Feel free to delete, editors!
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Alice Shaw July 3, 2012
I’m a little embarrassed to ask this question, not least of all because I tweeted about Sophie Mirabella last night, although I feel I was commenting on her behaviour rather than personally attacking her (others may disagree).. but is a “flamer”? Is it different than a troll?
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Benison O'Reilly July 3, 2012
I try to stay positive on Twitter although I may have made an occasional narky comment about Tony Abbott and the Kardashians. However, in my experience the trolls (and I’ve been victim of them) don’t have many followers at all, for good reason! Who wants to associate which such negativity? Trolls invariably hide behind a cloak of anonymity, too, so they’re cowards as well as bullies.
It’s also pointless trying to defend your views against these people, so it’s better not to engage with them at all. Ignore them (and block them) and they’ll eventually go away.
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Tania July 5, 2012
I think most of us are guilty for making the odd narky comment about Tony Abbott and the Kardashians!!
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Kate S. July 3, 2012
I have tweeted Tony Abbott as well! And I have made political tweets to an organisation that I thought was doing the wrong thing. I was a caught up in the moment and the rather ephemeral sense of power new Twitter users can get
.Afterwards I didn’t feel that good about that form of protest and won’t do it again. Back to the thoughtful letter.
Twitter does offer many opportunities and I think for most of us it’s a trial and error type of communication. I’ve found it most useful as a resource but one that is limited by the fact that to get the most from it you have to watch frequently. I don’t want to hand over my time to that activity. (too old now!)
There are many people who use Twitter very constructively. I still intend to take advantage of that from time to time.
Compulsive or even regular use of social media can be problematic and we probably all need to take time out.
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Samantha July 3, 2012
@Carol – I would love a post about how to be an Ironing Diva!!!! I TOTALLY fail at ironing.
@AliceShaw – A flamer is different from a troll (I think?). Trolling is inflammatory comments, and flaming is a verbal attack. But I guess really they all come from the same place.
Last night I got flamed (trolled) or snarked – I can’t work out which by someone who called me an ‘Aussie commie’ (I’m a kiwi for a start!!!).
Instead of feeling confronted, I tweeted the comment and had the funniest responses from people on my Twitter feed. Talk about turning a negative to a positive. I was laughing my head off at the responses for an hour
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liza July 3, 2012
what has got to me is the awful way the Liberal party have taken to bullying scientists .They have taken politics into the gutter with Ditch the witch .Bullying is the sport in parliament and I find that Joe public just does not want to know about WHY we need a carbon Tax.
I do worry about a warming planet and if our pollies behave in this manner then why are we surprised when people have a go. They are supposed to show leadership. -
Meg July 3, 2012
I emailed Greg Combet today to utter thanks for his compassion, not only in relation to Simon Sheikh but also in his attitude to the plight of asylum seekers and humanity in general And I still believe that both his and Mirabella’s reactions on QandA were symbolic of what I know of them as people.
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Mads July 3, 2012
@Carol the Ironing Diva : maybe you should rename yourself Ironing Yoda. You are wise and I think the world would be a fabulous place if there were more people like you
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Siggy July 4, 2012
Shows like Q and A invite the mob response… a reason I stopped watching. I do think something needs to be done about hate speech in general. It diminishes all of us. It’s too easy with an anonymous twitter account to be unpleasant. I had my first hate tweet last week from an anonymous (of course!) supposed freelance journalist. I think abusing a random member of the general public doesn’t fit so well with a code of ethics and I would certainly have made a complaint to his/her employers if I knew who he/she was!
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Lady Jewels Diva July 4, 2012
I have not yet read or heard anyone ask “WHAT was she supposed to do”.
Well, WHAT WAS SHE supposed to do?
It was not up to her to do anything, Tony is the host, there is a floor manager, director, floor crew, no one did anything for what, 10 seconds or more. Why have people left it up to her just because she was the one sitting beside him?
All I would have done was probably grabbed his arm and yell out “we need some help here”. That’s all anyone really can do.
No one knew, in that moment, whether he’d fainted, had a fit, was diabetic, epileptic etc, so really, it wasn’t up to Sophie to do anything. Because if she had, and something worse had happened, everyone would be saying she shouldn’t have done anything because she made it worse.
Come on people, there was nothing she could do and in reality, it wasn’t up to her to do anything anyway.
As for Greg Combet, he didn’t do much either, he was slow to the punch and all I saw him do was put his hands on his shoulders and mutter something along the lines of “You’re alright Simon.”
The director and floor manager/crew are the slackers to blame for not moving fast enough, not Sophie.
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JessB July 4, 2012
I find it interesting that very few people are talking about the lack of response from Tony as the host. Another case of the woman being bullied for not being motherly or caring enough?
But I do think that Sophie should have done something. I personally feel that in that situation, I would rather take some action, and have it not be needed, than take no action and have someone left untreated. I think your projected response, Lady Jewels Diva, to grab Simon’s arm and identify that you need some help, is perfectly adequate in that environment.
P.S. One time on the tram, I became convinced that the elderly gentleman opposite me was no longer asleep, but had stopped breathing. I changed position in my seat and ‘accidentally’ kicked him (very gently!), causing him to stir and breathe quite audibly. Of course I apologised most sincerely!!!
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narelle July 4, 2012
I don’t think anybody expected her to do anything, but maybe just show some concern and as somebody else said maybe a hand on the arm and a “are you all right”. You seem very ready to blame everybody else but not her. I for one am with the majority of people and try not to judge other people’s reactions under stress.
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narelle July 4, 2012
Sorry, my comment was intended as a reply to lady jewels divas comment
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KookyChic July 4, 2012
I think it all just comes down to our own insecurities, why else would we care so much about the words and opinions of people we don’t even know?
Why do these words touch such a nerve?
I used to be a frequent commenter at Mamamia, and I would feel quite hurt when someone ‘flamed’ me for my thoughts and opinions. I started to wonder about it quite a bit and the conclusion that I arrived at was that often the ‘flamers’ that upset me the most touched a sore point, one of my own insecurities or doubts.
Then I just got to a point where I stopped caring about what other people thought of me and focused on and fixed what I thought of myself. Because really, it doesn’t matter what other people think of me, especially random unknowns on the internet!
I agree with Samantha though – the mob mentality that exists via all forms of social media (including blogs) is adults bullying adults. Simple.
But slap the label ‘opinion’ on something and apparently you can say whatever you want.
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Lisa July 4, 2012
Imagine participating in a Q & A Panel and the person next to you suddenly passes out. You would already have a level of anxiety and adrenaline as you are on air. You would probably think, “WTF?”. It was so quick. I think she just froze and it’s turned into a stupid media circus. Others may have been quicker to react, others wouldn’t. She certainly doesn’t deserve to be demonized. If this deserves so much media attention in light of all the horror in the world, I just shake my head.
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Tom July 4, 2012
Excellent Sam. Spot on.
I’ve published some fairly personal articles on controversial topics (in varying degrees)… some of the comments leave me dumbfounded. And the amount of vitriol I see regularly on Twitter is appalling.
Yet for all that, I need to believe the good outweighs the bad. It has to. So I completely agree with what you’re saying. A little support goes a loooong way. I’ve given it, and seen how gratefully it was received; I’ve been given it in return, and I know what a difference it makes. -
Samantha July 5, 2012
Thanks Tom. I think you are right. I have met some amazing people on Twitter (including you!!). And I think you are so right that a little bit of support means a lot to many people
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