‘FAT’ ANCHOR HITS BACK AT BULLY
Do our television presenters and personalities have a “community responsibility” to present and promote healthy lifestyles?
That’s what one viewer in the USA thought when he wrote an email to CBS morning show presenter Jennifer Livingston saying:
“I was surprised to witness that your physical condition hasn’t improved for many years.
“Surely you don’t consider yourself a suitable example for this community’s young people, girls in particular. Obesity is one of the worst choices a person can make and one of the most dangerous habits to maintain. I leave you this note hoping that you’ll reconsider your responsibility as a local public personality to present and promote a healthy lifestyle.”
Whoa.
That’s one email from an opinionated viewer, but it clearly hit a very raw nerve with Livingston, who then went on air with her right of reply, and for four minutes gave an impassioned speech about being bullied.
You can watch her reply here.
In response to the criticism of her weight, Livingston says:
“…to the person who wrote me that letter do you think I don’t know that? That your cruel words are pointing out something that I don’t see?
“You don’t know me, you are not a friend of mine, you are not a part of my family. You have admitted you don’t watch this show, so you know nothing about me but what you see on the outside and I am much more than a number on a scale.”
Livingston went on to say she had a thick skin (“literally” she quips) but that her main concern was for children who might be bullied. October was, she said, was anti-bullying awareness month.
“The internet has become a weapon our schools have become a battleground. And this behaviour is learned – it is passed down from people like the man who wrote me that email.”
Is this about the danger of bullying, or about the danger of obesity?
Over to you.
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47 Responses to this article
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Kerri Sackville October 3, 2012
*stands and applauds*
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RES October 3, 2012
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RES October 3, 2012
– for the second time!!
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Clare October 3, 2012
what a beautiful, passionate and articulate woman
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Leesa October 3, 2012
What an awsome response from Jennifer. Yes it is bullying but I have to say that the medical profession has contributed to this. Obesity is being demonized and blown completely out of proportion. Of course there are health risks if you are over weight but there’s health risks to being alive for goodness sake.
I’m way over all these health warnings that seem to make people just feel crappy about themselves and give bullies more and more reasons to put others down. I’ve been a Registered Psychiatric Nurse for twenty-five years and I can say with no doubt that our perceptions of ourselves and this sort of bullying does more damage to our health than anything else.
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Ekka October 3, 2012
Leesa your comment was heartfelt. I felt I needed to comment. I am fat and at times I feel in this day and age the message I continually receive is that I don’t deserve to live… because I am fat.
It doesn’t matter that I am a highly educated woman who’s job deals with life and death decisions every day. It doesn’t matter that I try and hopefully succeed in being the best friend I can be to those close to me. It doesn’t matter that I cared for my mum in her own home until she passed away as that was her wish. It doesn’t matter that I am involved in education programs in Bali and volunteer my time during holidays to assist in the education of kids who would otherwise never get an education because some of them sell their wares and their bodies on the streets to European tourists just to survive.
No I am fat therefore I don’t deserve to live, I am fat so I am a bad role model to younger girls. I am fat so I must stuff my cakehole with cakes. Well.. I am so tired of this fat phobia.
At times I feel I don’t deserve to live, but you know …. reality steps in and I realise I do deserve to live. Fat is not who I am. The kids in Bali don’t care if i’m fat, they just run to the learning centre after school to see what we will do next because they are so hungry to learn. My mum didn’t care if I was fat, but she knew as her daughter was a nurse she would have the best care she could have in her last days on earth. My family and friends don’t care if I’m fat as we look after each other.
And guess what, I am actually healthy, normal blood pressure, normal cholesterol, I don’t smoke, I do go to the gym regularly, I lift weights, I walk on the treadmill, rI ide the bike and have walked the Milford Track and two other tracks in NZ with a fully laden pack weighing 15 kilos. But still….. I don’t deserve to live because i am fat? . I think I do.
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Manion October 3, 2012
It’s bullying. Would the man who wrote this comment have said that to her face if he was sat next to her at a dinner party, and they had never met before? This was not a comment written in concern for the young people in the community.
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moiby October 3, 2012
Loved this.
People who are overweight are at a disadvantage over others. Nobody can tell you if you overdo alcohol or drugs – but everybody thinks they know someone’s vice and assumes a lack of exercise if someone is overweight. Slim people who don’t exercise are never told to get out more.
Sizeism is probably the last acceptable prejudice.
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The Huntress October 3, 2012
An excellent response! Regardless of what ones weight/health status/whatever happens to be it’s not acceptable to bully that person. Obesity is one of the last “acceptable” calls in discrimination and bullying and IT’S NOT OK. Bullying is not accepted in relation to any other health condition, so let’s end bullying and discrimination towards people who are overweight NOW. I’m tired of the hatred and virtriol towards people who happen to be overweight (and I’ve never been overweight, I can’t imagine how people who are must be feeling in the centre of the so called ‘obesity crisis’) – I’m sure most people are doing the best they can to be as healthy as they can and regardless, that is between their doctor and nurse. It’s noone elses business.
End of rant.
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sue October 3, 2012
…..actually I think she is an EXCELLENT example for any community. We need more people to be brave enough to speak up as she has and lead a challenge against bullies – particularly the ones that hide behind the anonymous curtains of facebook. I wish I was more like her.
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Simone October 3, 2012
I long for the day when ‘fat’ is not an insult. Just as the colour of your skin is no longer an acceptable cause for insult. We thought we’d never see racism or homophobia so reviled as it is today, perhaps prejudice against size is next? I really hope so.
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Rachael October 3, 2012
So women in the public eye like Lindsay Lohan and Kate Moss are living exemplary lifestyles because they are ‘thin’? I think we need to very careful about what we choose to use as measures of healthy, successful lifestyles; we are heading down a path of demonising ‘fat’ people in a way that is on par with racial discrimination in the era of segregation, passing moral judgements on people for their physical appearance and it is reprehensible. Yes, obesity is a burden on our health system, but so are smoking, alcohol, drug use, speeding and other risky, personal lifestyle choices and the methods of addressing them are complex. Walking up to someone and telling them they are ‘fat’ is bullying, not a solution.
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Valerie October 3, 2012
I’m still trying to get my head around someone sitting at home and thinking it was important to write and send that email.
Does he walk down the street and tell overweight people to pick up their game? Is extra weight on his TV screen really that offensive? I wonder if he would have sent that email to Oprah?
I’m thinking way too much about him, when really, it’s her I want to celebrate.
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liza October 3, 2012
I agree with Valerie.
What sort of life can this man have if he is vexed by a presenters weight.?
That reminds me I must go and set my tomatoes.
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Marnie October 3, 2012
I think she looks great. She’s smaller than me and I although I am sixty years old and obese I do not have diabetes, heart or cholesterol problems. I don’t diet, the only exercise I do is walking and on the odd occasion my doctor asks how much I weigh, I tell him I don’t do numbers, that’s his domain. My life would have been much happier if I could buy clothes in my size and if people had not judged me but I am over all that.
What I am saying is, Jennifer does not need to have a perfect looking body to be healthy and she doesn’t need to be slim to set an example to other young ladies. She has done that with her words. Well done Jennifer, you rock. -
Aeron Winters October 3, 2012
What’s wrong with the way she looks? I think she looks fantastic. We weren’t all born to be stick thin. She is beautiful and very articulate and she obviously has a lot more going for her than the troll her wrote the bullying letter.
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Dr Rick Kausman October 3, 2012
A brave and terrific response by Jennifer. No question it is about the danger of bullying. There are two issues here.
Firstly there is a huge amount of bullying going on directed to people who are above their most healthy weight and to people who are just bigger people and not above their most healthy weight. Bullying of any type is clearly inappropriate. It is also harmful in many ways.
Secondly, the dangers of so-called ‘obesity’ have been shown to be at best (or is that worst?) grossly exaggerated. Research shows that health and well-being is much more about the person’s physical activity levels, mindful eating, self-compassion etc.. and not about their weight or size. As a good friend of mine says, as a society we are focussing on the wrong ‘W’. We are focussing on the ‘W’ for Weight rather than the ‘W’ for Well-being.
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Glynnis Henderson October 3, 2012
I applaud Jennifer for her articulate response to this bully. I too have been bullied about my weight most of my life, so can understand how she feels.
I also applaud Dr Kausman for his comments that we should be focussing on “Well-Being” rather than “weight”. I do exercise and eat healthily and have no health issues apart from Coeliac Disease, which I control with diet.
We need to ensure that our children grow up to understand the importance of a good diet, fun exercise and respecting others! -
Janet Georgouras October 3, 2012
Trolling is a sign of mental illness.
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Jax October 3, 2012
As a former fatty having lost 30 kilos in 3 months without the use of exercise just lifestyle dieting changes, and having kept it off for the past 3 years, I find it very difficult to sympathise with someone who I now know can loose the weight quite easily. She says in the start of the video that the letter comes from a man whom does not follow her show so why did she read the letter and why has she chosen this letter to retaliate to?
I think Mr anonymous does have a point, she is a public figure who should take care of herself, what is the difference between seeing an obese person on television and a news anchor smoking a cigarette while reading the news? both are notorious killers and I don’t want to hear the excuse people who are fat can’t help it. I am living proof that its a simple change.
I think this woman’s message is so mixed. Is it one of bullying or one of being fat? She compares a random letter from someone anonymous that she has no relationship with to bullies in high schools where a lot of the conflict is face to face, she needs a reality check.
I think she had the right intentions I just think she has gone about it is all wrong, some children are brought up being fed rubbish and cant help it but a 40 something woman has the choice.
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Joni October 3, 2012
I agree with Jax so Jax is not in the minority. Saying that obesity or overweight is normal, desirable and healthy will contribute to many people not doing anything to lose the weight and then suffering horrible health problems as a result. Anyone in the public eye is a role model whether they like it or not.
Better to be cruel to be kind.
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Janet Georgouras October 4, 2012
Another argument from fallacy Joni. “I agree with Jax, therefore Jax is not in the minority. Sorry, does not cut it. When is two a majority? When it is against one.
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Janet Georgouras October 4, 2012
Heavens, what an argument Jax. “I did it so can you.” This is an argument of analogy that assumes that this woman is exactly like you. The world was not made in your image.
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g October 3, 2012
the email was out of line, sure, but she seems a bit over-sensitive about it.
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Paul Winkler October 3, 2012
Bullying.
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Jo October 3, 2012
Thank GOODness “Jax” is in the minority! I am so heartened to read all of the other responses to this story. It’s positive support and encouragement that is desperately needed by people suffering the DISEASE of obesity. And as I know from treating people with food and weight related issues, there is rarely a simple or easy solution. Thank you for the 18 other respondents who have “lightened my load” today! x
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KB October 3, 2012
Firstly to Jax who has lost weight, congratulations and now for the reality check exactly how many attempts has that taken? Regardless of the times 1 or several, erroneously assuming because you achieved something then it must stand that others should and can do the same. Ah if only life were that simple no one would be in debt and we would have all replicated the vast wealth of the few such as Gates, Jobs, Branson etc.
Sorry if that sounds harsh but a reality check is needed here and if you have found what works for you, brings you happiness and health then I congratulate you, just please recognise that it doesn’t work that way for everyone and it makes them no less or no better than you, just different and just as valid. As someone mentioned earlier would you stand in front of Oprah and say the same thing to her???
Speculating about someone’s size and the cause of that size, race, sexual persuasion, ability etc is just another form of bullying and opportunity for discrimination in my opinion, more subtle but it occurs so often that it too has become normalised and we don’t recognise or call it out. This time we have an opportunity to recognise it and call it out. Well done to Jennifer for calling it out and the others I see who are backing her. When we spend as much time dissecting how amazing someone is for all they are then better off this world will be. -
Carole October 3, 2012
I think some of you have missed the point, I think this about BULLYING not weight.
She is confronting the bully and standing up for herself , I think this is the way to deal with bullies.Over the last few days we have had the example of Allan Jones being brought to account for his ongoing abuse of our Prime Minister.
Tony Abbott , who is also a serial Name Caller and Abuser of the PM has also received condemnation for his behavior.The response by both of these bullies is to whinge & whine that they are receiving some of there own abuse back .
In my opinion that’s what they deserve and may be the only way to put a stop there ongoing abuse .
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Carole October 3, 2012
Meant to say ” the only way to put a stop to Bullies”.
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Annie Also October 3, 2012
Finally the message may get through that anyone, anywhere can come up to you as a fat person and say the most personal and atrocious things ‘in the nicest possible way’. “Fat” is the new basis of all jokes and can be used as a villification tool to declare all those who are ‘weak willed and lazy’ are a disgrace as a role model to their children and to the rest of society.
THIS has been my experience. No matter who you are, where you go, who knows you, your ‘fatness’ is your calling card. You take up too much room, you are a burden to those next to you, whether seated or standing and you are a shame to your children.
This is how it is now in the ‘thin is beautiful’ society of today.
‘Fat’n'ugly’ is now one word. It is YOUR fault and YOUR responsibility to be somehow how others want you to be.
It makes me angry because it makes me invisible, and seemingly ignorant, slovenly, crass, unhealthy and unattractive.
Fat is the last bastion of the bully to practise their power upon.
And I am sick of it.
(Thanks for the topic) -
Rhoda October 3, 2012
I personally think the emailer was just being plain rude but I applaud how she stood up for herself.
The level of verbal aggression in our society these days is so high that we don’t recognize when we’ve crossed the line any more. It’s a slippery slope. I can remember when saying ‘shut up’ was the rudest thing you could say to anyone.
If we are ever to stop bullying then we have to lower the level of aggression we direct towards each other and become more civil and courteous.
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Amanda October 3, 2012
I think Livingstone’s response was excellent. Articulate and unfaltering.
If she thought the email was bullying, then as the recipient of that email she is entitled to say it is bullying and present it in that way.
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Ro.Watson October 3, 2012
Not o.k for health authorities to use negative messages to support demonising, bullying,ostracising behaviour~ this kind of public health invective leads to immeasureable mental health issues and does not support well-being…
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Ro.Watson October 3, 2012
.meanwhile trying to read your veil/moral compass article and keep getting blocked eg wrong address etc… though I have got every other article today~assume it is some corruption your way in delivering your latest article? Perhaps not. Who knows.
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Merryl Chantrell October 3, 2012
Jennifer you are cool calm and collected and the TV Station that employs you is indeed lucky to have you.
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Benison O'Reilly October 3, 2012
Have to say that it’s great in the first place that the TV network employs her – even in Australian commercial media a female’s journalistic credentials tend to take the back seat to her decorativeness. However, she certainly doesn’t deserve to receive bullying letters about her weight. .
That said as a health professional I think the medical profession has a duty of care to raise obesity as a health issue. The life expectancy of Americans is dropping again now for the first time in decades and obesity is fairly and squarely the cause.
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Catherine October 3, 2012
No, Mr. O’Rielly, no it isn’t. Obesity is not a disease that automatically shortens your life span. It doesn’t even automatically mean that you’re unhealthy. There are a lot of obese people with health problems, but there are also a lot of thin or average-sized people with health problems. The two most common “results” of being obese that I hear about are heart disease and diabetes – things that happen to a wide range of people over all sorts of size and economic spectrums. The average lifespan of an American has actually increased, not decreased, according to all the statistics google can put at my disposal, so I have no idea where you’re getting your facts.
Basically your comment boils down to: “Fat people don’t deserve to be bullied, but they’re totes a major health issue and the reason we’re all dying younger!”
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ai October 3, 2012
I am so tired of this demonetization of size. It is far more important to be happy and as healthy as you can be what-ever size. I have been a size 24 and have been a size 12 for the last 7 years. I made some changes and it was a slow process, but that doesn’t give me the right to put on my holier than thou cape. I personally love people of all shapes and sizes – not because of their size, but because of their heart.
I believe that many people cut their lives short by yo-yo dieting, because of this sort of bullying. For goodness sake – viva la difference. Health professionals *at least the good ones, encourage healthy lifestyles and don’t beat up their patients because of their weight, but rather encourage them to make changes to help their health, even if they remain overweight.
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Judith Rubbish October 4, 2012
I wasn’t going to respond as I had nothing more to add to all of these amazing posts, so many beautiful and caring and articulate contributors to Hoopla. But had to say to Ekka, you are a very remarkable woman and your post touched me on many levels, you rock!
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Merryn October 4, 2012
Having been the victim of bullying in the past (my whole school experience), I have to say that I do not think that one isolated email counts as bullying. Victimisation, perhaps, but not bullying. Bullying is repeated, calculated attacks.
This woman received one email, in which she was not called fat, but in which someone simply observed that her physical appearance had not changed over several years. Livingstone herself admitted that she is overweight. She admitted that the email’s contents were correct. The email did not say that she had no right to live, or be a good mother or wife, but rather, given her public profile, perhaps she was not the best role model for people. Harsh but fair, in my opinion.
This woman is obese, according to her own words about a doctor’s scale. She is also, more than simply a number on a scale. She is articulate, passionate, caring, likely a wonderful mother and wife. However, the fact remains: she is obese.
The cost of obesity and weight-related health concerns is phenomenal, some billions of dollars every year here in Australia. Imagine what the cost is in America… As the mother of three girls, this woman needs to be telling her children that whilst bullying is not acceptable, focusing on maintaining a healthy weight is much better than being overweight and crying bully every time someone calls you on it. Sure, having someone call you fat is nasty, but it isn’t bullying. It’s simply rude. We seem to be so hasty to place the moniker of bullying on comments that are simply harsh; rude; or inappropriate. Simply because one person calls you fat does not mean that person has bullied you. If that person sends you emails every day for a year saying the same thing, then that is bullying. There is a difference.
Livingstone’s comments about taking responsibility also struck me. Self responsibility is all fine and dandy, but when the Australian tax payer as a whole is forced to pay for the consequences of obesity (and let’s face it, the numbers just continue to grow) that means money is being redirected from other health areas. Australia’s health budget is already strained, due to an ageing population and the rising incidence of weight-related issues due to a high obesity rate. Obesity is, for the most part, something that can be alleviated, through diet, exercise and personal choices.
Whilst I reiterate that this man’s email was harsh, I must say that I do not think it was bullying. The comment was made as an observation – an observation made by someone who lives in a country with the highest number of obese people in the world (Australia has the highest number per capita, but USA has more obese people).
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Merryn October 4, 2012
*Livingston. Apologies for the misspell
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NoComment of Nunawading October 4, 2012
I only wish that Jennifer Livingston could see just how far reaching her emotional and heartfelt response to bullying has been… a beautiful, articulate woman, Jennifer has earned a place in my heart. I applaud her for taking the time to address “that” e-mail, on behalf of herself and the thousands, probably millions of people worldwide who feel exactly the same.
Though not “fat” myself (I have certainly been there), and what a dreadful, hurtful word that is, Jennifer’s comments inspired me, motivated me and encouraged me to share my thoughts here.
To the contributors here who also told their stories, especially Ekka, thank-you for sharing such personal experiences… as I do for Jennifer Livingston, I stand and applaud you all for your courage and your honesty and may you all live long and prosper, free from bullying, in whatever shape or size suits you at this time in your lives!
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Roni Jean October 4, 2012
I tend to view my life as ‘before I was fat’ and ‘when I was fat’. Before I was fat, people often told me how articulate and intelligent I was, how capable and confident I was. They would come to me for advice, help, and quite a few looked up to me. When I was fat, I was made to feel stupid, worthless… frivolous, even. My opinion didn’t seem to matter that much anymore, and I felt I was often disdained, rather than looked up to. I can almost hear people thinking, “How can you expect to give me advice when you have obviously have no control over your own life?” This happened not only in my professional life, but my personal life as well. Am I bittered by this? You bet. It’s interesting to note that my online friends treat me with the greatest respect and commraderie, and I feel most comfortable chatting to them. What I look like doesn’t matter to them. There’s nothing wrong with my personality, my morals, my ethics or my ability to communicate – I’m just fat. I’ve just had a gastric sleeve operation which removed 85% of my stomach. I didn’t do this for my self-esteeem, but for my health. However, I’m interested to see if I’m treated any differently by those who know me as a fat person, or will they still see me as fat?
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anna October 5, 2012
Good on Ekka, what a great response! The newsreader looks good I don’t know what the problem is as long as she is healthy thats all that matters. Good on her for her response on air. We cannot help what our body shape is also!
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wills October 6, 2012
The viewer who wrote to Livingstone was somewhat rude & ignorant.
But, I don’t believe the event of one privately sent email, should be regarded as bullying. We wouldn’t have known about it otherwise, but she has chosen to make this a public event to highlight how she has been bullied by this one viewer with his email.
I myself was a fat kid in primary school & high school, and know what constant & sustained bullying feels like. Those days are long gone for me.
I just kind of get the sense that she’s being melodramatic – and should just move on. If she’s happy with her life in general, then just let it go…
Quite obviously though – she’s not happy with herself – she is hurting inside – and I know what that feels like. I lived that existence for many years. Her response in the video is really a cry for help. In one part of the video, she says it doesn’t affect her, and she’s not hurt by what he said – so why did she even record a response?
Some reading this may think I’m being harsh, but I’m just being a realist. As a former fatty, I lost the weight via hard work & determination. It wasn’t ‘easy’ – you have to do the hard yards, to reach your goals.
“If you want something badly enough, you’ll fight to the very end, to achieve it”.
