DEAR INTERWEBS, DROP DEAD
In the “good old days” when it was your friend’s birthday you’d pop a card in the mail, on the day you’d give her a call to sing Happy Birthday, then you’d meet at a bar and get stonkered.
Nowadays, it’s so much harder. Not only is your friend likely to be on some sort of detox, but you’ve also got a lot more hurdles to jump when it comes to social media etiquette.
Now, when it’s your friend’s birthday you pop a card in the mail, you post a message on her Facebook Wall, send her text, tweet her a message, pop an Instagram picture of a cup cake up on Pinterest, send an email asking when she’d like to catch up for a decaf soy latte, leave a comment on her blog about how wonderful she is and once you’ve covered all the bases, you give her a call to sing her Happy Birthday.
Then you drink a bottle of wine at home alone because you’re too exhausted to leave the house. And frankly, by then you’re over the friend’s birthday anyway.
What is the etiquette? Do people expect you to contact them on all the possible communication mediums?
What if you choose the wrong social platform to reach out? What if you only send a text and your friend’s left her phone at home and then thinks you’ve forgotten her birthday? Is it really a big deal or do I just over think things? I swear my social media anxiety is getting worse every day.
And what happens if you do actually forget your friend’s birthday? How can you blame misplacing your calendar? A reminder of her birthday pops up on Facebook now. You are backed into a corner of always being on game.
The pressure is on to not only remember her birthday, but to acknowledge it multiple times.
And it’s not just birthdays that have been complicated by social media. You should try giving birth in this modern era of over-sharing and instant information accessibility.
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16 Responses to this article
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Catherine Rodie Blagg July 27, 2012
Hilarious! I totally relate. Ive been a massive Facebook for years, have to admit that since I’ve been able to write a happy birthday message on a friends walk I’ve been a bit slack at actually mailing them a card!
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Bern Morley July 27, 2012
Hi B!
I for one am thankful that FB gives me a heads up it’s someone’s b’day or else I’d be in a world of trouble. My Mum had this birthday book that she faithfully opened on a weekly basis, bought a card and sent it out. Then got the complete shits if it was acknowledged.
I myself have just spent the last 20 minutes finding the perfect funny picture for a friend’s facebook wall to wish him a Happy Birthday. I still hope, even though it’s a faster and easier medium that it makes him feel a bit special, because that’s really all you want isn’t it?
Food for thought B x
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Bern Morley July 27, 2012
*wasn’t acknowledged. Perhaps if I spent less time dicking around on the internet looking for pictures and more time proof reading, etc
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Miss L July 27, 2012
If your friends really expect all that they must be pretty demanding…
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Pamela July 27, 2012
Acknowledgement of the big day via any method is a must – cards are too hard and too expensive – save a tree and email, text, FB or Tweet .
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Shiralee July 27, 2012
where do you buy your cards from my family and friends all buy my birthday cards from $2 shops for $2 or less and a stamp costs 60c.I’m happy they took the time to go out and picked out something for me. And yes I am happy to get text or Facebook or phone calls from those who don’t send cards.
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Emily July 27, 2012
I actually make a point of sticking to one thing. If I’ve called someone for their birthday, I don’t do the facebook thing.
But it doesn’t go unnoticed. I had someone ask why I didn’t post a gushy, loving message to my hubby on his birthday. Why should I? I said those gushy, loving words to his face!!
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sami July 27, 2012
Emily there are so many people that do both but I don’t know why! Drives me nuts. My friend and her hubby write massive lovey messages to each other on facebook, thanking each other for being so great or so understanding or even making a drink. THEY ARE IN THE SAME ROOM TOGETHER. Does not compute.
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Trish July 27, 2012
I miss the birthday cards *sob* , so true and we stress over making sure friends have appreciated our efforts.
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Glenis July 27, 2012
Must say that I do make an effort with birthday cards and that people really appreciate it. I bought a box of lovely decorated 3D cards and send those. I do not really like email cards at all.
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Kelly @ Handmade Tears and Triumphs July 29, 2012
On my last birthday I received a card in the mail, and what made it so special was exactly what you’ve said here, no one bothers to do it anymore! It’s much more thoughtful than the obligatory facebook wall post
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Donna @ NappyDaze July 30, 2012
I love this B! I was agonising over this the other day and then suddenly stopped short of slapping msyelf for wasting precious energy worrying whether I should still text when I’d facebooked by birthday wishes already. I say the interwebz were meant to make life easier so I’ll still leave it at just the one birthday blessing message, whichever medium I choose x
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Alex August 3, 2012
It’s so hilarious where comments end up sometimes! I love this and I know exactly what you mean. Personally, I write a thank you to each person that ‘happy birthday’s me on Facebook but I do not return the favour.
I know. I don’t do the facebook happy birthday.
I text or call for those in this country. Occasionally, I facebook or twitter happy birthday to overseas friends.
Done. BAM!
PS – I kind of love the idea of doing this: “Now you have to rip out the whole modem and flush your mobile down the loo.”
