STUCK FOR SOMETHING TO SAY?
Ever been stuck for something to say? You know, when your brain turns to complete mush and the people you are with start to fear you are having a stroke?
It happens to me quite frequently, and as my plate gets fuller and I am becoming more and more incapable of engaging in complex conversations, I have had to come up with some “cheat sheet” type lines, so I can smoothly glide over those potentially awkward pauses in conversations, or in my dealings with difficult people.
As I get older, my tolerance has decreased for social intercourse with complete half-wits.
But life is made up with a kaleidoscope of folk whose opinions are different to yours, or whose idea of a great conversation is your idea of hell. Perhaps you have stumbled across a group of intellectually superior beings, or maybe, you just cannot take another slinging match with an objectionable family member?
Remember these four lines and use them as you see fit. I have given you some scenarios that may be familiar to you.
“There is really a lot to consider.”
This simple line is so very varied in how it can be applied. A really good option if you are stuck chatting with a dullard. For example if you are talking to a complete bore who is waffling on and on about their choice of ceiling insulation they chose and how it was installed, and then they shake you out of your coma by asking what insulation you would choose, then this is your line.
“I have never really thought about it that way.”
This is a great comeback for someone who you have been arguing with for far too long and you just want to exit the exchange without it turning into a complete shit fight. Particularly helpful when dealing with family members who you cannot afford to have a big-time rift with.
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21 Responses to this article
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Kerri Sackville July 5, 2012
The sage nod. Don’t forget the sage nod. Makes words themselves become redundant.
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Kim-Marie July 5, 2012
I like to employ the “smile and nod”. Often with teeth firmly clenched lest I speak. Best used when dealing with family.
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La Hola July 5, 2012
So many…too many.
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amd July 5, 2012
“Maybe so, maybe so….. “one my mother used to use. If it’s a question – “Why do you want to know that?” sometimes works (In a polite voice). Or, yes, just smile and wander off or change the subject. So long as we remember we are not required to answer rudeness at all, if we choose not to, it’s all good. I like the interesting times one, good for those concentration lapses.
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Carmel July 5, 2012
I have never really thought about it like that before… I can think of a million situations where that line would have come in handy.
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Pammo July 5, 2012
Yep, yep, yep…nodding. I often find myself in this situation when having a political discussion with my boss, who is right leaning to my bleeding heart socialist self
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Dee July 5, 2012
Great advice, as I often find myself overdoing the “mmmm, that’s an interesting point” schtick in these situations.
Thank, you for sharing your thoughts, Mrs Woog, and I say that in the least ironic and most sincere way -
The Huntress July 5, 2012
I must confess I have a rather obnoxious social habit and I hope I won’t be judged to harshly for it…
When in company of a particular brand of person (sexist, racist, homophobic, refugee bashing narcissist) and I don’t want to to argue with them I start talking about philosophical argumentative fallacies. There is nothing like saying “Post hoc ergo propter hoc” to an obnoxious guest at whatever function you have to be attending (I look forward to the day someone actually can have this discourse with me, I LOVE a good debate) – they don’t want to look stupid (because they’re usually holding court and bashing everyone who doesn’t share their perspective), but don’t want to look stupid either. It can work 2 ways, either the nasty diatribe will stop or they will pretend that they know what I’m talking about and just look silly.
And that’s when I walk away – I have learned to never argue with a fool.
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Lisa Lee July 5, 2012
If ever I get to have a chat with you Mrs. Woog, I’ll be waiting for “there is really a lot to consider”. I’ll take that as my cue to slink away xx
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Stacey July 5, 2012
I use “I appreciate your comments” when I’m getting “helpful” advice. It is polite although the unspoken “shut the f@#k up” just hangs in the air!
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sam July 5, 2012
I have been trying to get around listening to the same story over and over again. My elderly mother-law is staying with us and last night after suffering through the same story for the fourth time in as many days I said.”let me stop you there, you have told me that story before” She immediately got very hurt and refused to talk to me for the rest of the evening. Any suggestions on how to tackle it next time?
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Joni July 5, 2012
She may have been nervous and/or suffering dementia. My mum repeats the same stories 50 x and I have learnt to just listen patiently or carefully change the subject.
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Stacey July 5, 2012
My Mum is a story repeater and I always just say “oh that’s right, you told me about that”. Half the time it works, the rest of the time she continues on her merry way and continues the story!
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Joni July 5, 2012
I was guest speaker at a conference and was asked to answer a question which had (to me) an unidentified industry based acronym in it. I stood up and waited for silence to answer the question and then the convener repeated the question with the acronym now in full.
PHEW – What a relief! I was very lucky.
I’ve found that waiting may make a person repeat the question with more detail.
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Nancy July 6, 2012
Great lines! I have committed them to memory. Thanks Mrs Woog!
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Trish July 6, 2012
Very sage assvice indeed.
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Carli July 6, 2012
Great advice. I’ve used a number of these on my mother-in-law. I find the “repeat back” helpful when someone makes an underhanded comment and you can’t think of a comeback – “Sorry? You think I’m making the baby sick because of the new Ikea rug?” That kind of thing.
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Megan Frankie July 6, 2012
‘We live in interesting times…’ – Isn’t that the sort of thing that vacuous celebrity TV presenters say? A dead giveaway, I would have thought.
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Mrs Woog July 6, 2012
Works for me! Xx
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