MIRANDA, A WINE WITH YOUR WHINE?
Dear Miranda,
It’s been a while since we crossed swords, so it was intriguing on the weekend to read your theories about the cause of the UK riots. It was such a master stroke linking the riots to the announcement that Senator Penny Wong and Sophie Allouache are expecting a baby. Nobody would have thought of that!
Except maybe Bob Katter.
Or Barnaby Joyce.
Or that Murphy guy from Western Sydney who nobody had heard of before.
David Cameron must be relieved. I am sure he had a sleepless flight on the way back from Tuscany once the riots were nearly over, thinking about how complex the solution to this perplexing problem was going to be. That was, until he read your piece showing how it all boiled down to “a fatherless society”. Lesbian mothers. Single mothers. Penny and Sophie. Pass a law to make fathers compulsory and stop them ever leaving and bingo. Problem solved!
Bummer when the UK papers reported how many rich kids from private schools and living with biological mum and dad were arrested for looting.
Don’t you hate it when the facts get in the way of a good theory?
Apparently you were also concerned that some people were “having a field day, cynically using the four-month pregnancy as a weapon in the relentless push for same-sex marriage”. Well, I wouldn’t exactly say cynical. But two people in a committed relationship expecting a child in a country where marriage equality is one of the top three political issues of our time… certainly had the potential for comment don’t you think?
Oh, and before I forget… you know that invitation I sent to you on Twitter over the weekend?… You know… the one asking you to come to our place for a family dinner, meet the wife and kids and tell us what rights we don’t deserve?
Some people thought I was being sarcastic. But I wasn’t. Not really.
You see, for years Jackie and I have beaten a path to the doors of politicians with views EVEN more right wing than yours seem to be, and we all managed to express our views without the need for a first aid kit or a dose of Valium. Some of them even managed to see that legal protection for each other and for our children and other families like ours would actually be a stabilising factor for the community. A “conservative value” even.
It’s less of an uphill battle these days because we have the weight of public opinion behind us. You’d have to be Rumplestiltskin to have missed the plethora of opinion polls saying, well pretty much “Just change the Marriage Act and get on with it”.
Like many others, I really felt for you when you implored people to stop giving you a hard time. It must have come as such a shock. Fourteen or so years ago when I started writing responses to your columns there weren’t as many people prepared to declare their hand as it were.
In what is obviously a shock to you, there was actually a big backlash. Really big.
You see, there are so few people still in the closet these days you can’t turn around in a major city or even a big country town without bumping into an “out” gay man or lesbian. We’re everywhere! And we don’t just sit in the background any more feeling hurt and angry and depressed at comments like we caused the London riots or we are bad for our children.
No, we fight back. We speak out. We don’t put up with unsubstantiated and hollow accusations that our reasonable expectation for respect and social justice is some sort of vendetta against well-meaning religious fundamentalists.
I must say, one of the things we could talk about at our dinner party is this other intriguing theory of yours:
“Sure, there are aberrations, and you can always find evils within traditional families, domestic violence and child abuse. But even this imperfect institution is better than the Hobbesian social chaos the children of the underclasses have been born into for the last 50 years.”
I can’t wait to hear how you worked through research to draw the conclusion that a child being beaten up or sexually abused is better off than one raised by a loving and secure single parent or two mothers or two fathers, or functional step-parents. That could be a social science breakthrough.
So just one question remains… red wine or white?
Professor Kerryn Phelps, AM
August 17, 2011
RELATED STORIES:
*Professor Kerryn Phelps, AM is Adjunct Professor at Sydney University in the Faculty of Medicine in the School of General Practice and Con Joint Professor at the University of New South Wales in the faculty of Public Health and Community Services.
Prof Phelps has been a familiar face to many Australians over the last 20 years during which time she has appeared regularly on television, radio and the print media informing the Australian public on health issues.
In 2009, she hosted Channel 7’s “Last Chance Surgery”, one of the highest-rating shows of the season. She has been the health writer for The Australian Women’s Weekly for nearly 20 years and writes political commentary for Medical Observer Magazine. She is a regular commentator on general practice, public health, medical politics and human rights issues.
In May 2000 Prof Phelps was elected Federal President of the Australian Medical Association, becoming the first woman to head this organisation and serving a maximum term of three years.
Prof Phelps has two medical clinics in Sydney and her particular interest is in the area of Integrative medicine. In December 2009 she was elected President of the Australasian Integrative Medical Association and in 2010 was the author of a textbook on Integrative Medicine which was published by Elsevier.
In 2003 she was awarded the Centenary Medal for services to Health and Medicine. In 2011 Prof Phelps was awarded the Order of Australia for services to Medicine.
For more information go here. Follow Prof Phelps on Twitter @drkerrynphelps
45 Responses to this article
-
Mrs Woog August 17, 2011
Loved your recent tweets Kerryn. You are one smart cookie xxx
-
Lou Pardi August 17, 2011
Brilliant, that you wrote it and it is brilliant. And heartbreaking, that you had something so ridiculous to respond to.
-
Cate August 17, 2011
Well said. Nailed it. And us happily married heterosexuals speak out now, because we care too.
I also took umbrage at Devine’s insinuation that families are better off having fathers who bash and abuse rather than having no father at all and commented as such on her post. No response of course.
Good luck if that dinner party ever eventuates. Oh, to be a fly on the wall….. -
Celia August 17, 2011
Bravo. And just to add, if the problem is fatherless children, suely those with two fathers would be even better off?
-
Anna Wallace August 17, 2011
Will someone please send this to Miranda Devine – she would not be smart enough to be a subscriber to the Hoopla
-
kerry August 17, 2011
yeah baby
-
Phil August 17, 2011
-
harajukujude August 17, 2011
good onya Kerryn- you are right and if i had a dollar for every brain cell Miranda Devine has – i’d have a dollar!
-
Barking Owl October 27, 2011
Way too generous – I am sure you would get change
-
-
Maree August 17, 2011
Thanks Kerryn for putting that bigot in her place, fantastic work.
-
Sarah L August 17, 2011
Well said. Devine’s whole argument was baffling, non-sensical and seemed to be deliberately inflammatory. I hope she takes you up on your offer, but somehow, sadly, I doubt that she will.
-
Leith August 17, 2011
I had just had surgery when I read Devine’s article and thought the drugs were playing tricks on me. Love your work.
-
Vicki August 17, 2011
Love your work Dr Phelps! Thank you so very much for your wonderful reply to such a ridiculous piece of dribble from Ms Devine.
-
Del Widdowson August 17, 2011
You complete spunk, Kerryn.
-
Mark August 17, 2011
Amazing response! Very well written. Thank you
-
Tom Dwyer August 17, 2011
Kerryn, you have been then epitome of balanced view and empirical justification for all you’ve espoused over your career. Who is this gobshite that draws comment? Seems this is a Telegraphic constant, keeping up with the piers methinks?
-
MadOldBear August 17, 2011
Well put Doc! Unfortunately I fear Miranda Devine won’t have the courage to enter a debate with you or even acknowledge your response to her idiotic column.
Great big gay bear hugs to you xo -
whitecrow August 17, 2011
I just received an email from GetUp on this very topic.
” “It won’t stop at homosexual marriage – look for polygamy and marriage between adults and children to be legalised. There is no greater dream for a paedophile than to be able to legally acclaim a child as his lover.”
That’s what keynote speaker Rebecca Hagelin declared yesterday at the “don’t meddle with marriage” event at Parliament House, as she was joined on stage by Barnaby Joyce and other conservative Australian politicians. She said there is “no greater evil” than legalising same-sex marriage, and told the crowd to join her in a “war for the future of the human race.” ”
The most terrifying thing about these people – Miranda Devine and her ilk – is how easily they spout the Tea Party rubbish, and how many people flock to hear more. As Robert Manne puts it “the quest for social justice [has become] the politics of envy”. It’s a pity she will never read this article or these comments.
-
kevin mcgreal August 17, 2011
“No, we fight back. We speak out. We don’t put up with unsubstantiated and hollow accusations that our reasonable expectation for respect and social justice is some sort of vendetta against well-meaning religious fundamentalists.” Exactly Prof Phelps and I can’t wait for equality to be the norm so we can fight for the real issues facing mankind- and all together!
-
Selina August 17, 2011
Thank goodness for Kerryn Phelps – I’m living in London and only just read Miranda Devine’s ridiculous column, which made me fume.
We can only hope she’s trying to stir up controversy in an attempt to remain relevant. The media needs more opinion from intelligent, articulate women like Prof Phelps, not fools like Ms Devine.
-
AJ August 18, 2011
Bravo.
But shame on the media who continue to give disproportionate ‘air time’ to the radical minorities on a whole host of subjects.
-
Craig August 18, 2011
Awesome! Miranda stop peddling hate. You have no hard evidence to back your theories. The argument’s moved on, and you look like a fool.
-
Drew August 18, 2011
Can I ask Kerryn what the other two top political issues of our time are aside from marriage equality in your view?
-
David G August 18, 2011
Well said Kerryn. I was sent this link by my brother in Canberra and I am surprised our (sometimes) alert UK press didn’t pick up on that silly bigot’s arguments about the cause of the riots here in London. Same -sex couples? They would have LOVED writing about that theory! Don’t be silly dahlenk – we were all home painting our nails! Stupid, sour old bigot – I didn’t realise you had a Tea Party in Australia as well……..
-
Smoph August 18, 2011
Thank you Professor Phelps. We need more respected community members willing to stand up for the rights of others.
I would also like to express disgust in the way she essentially accused Senator Wong of being the poster child for same-sex marriage (really, just marriage for all in my heart). It seems like Senator Wong has done her best to keep her sexuality and related battles out of her professional life. And yet, everyone seems determined to make her the target/poster child for their own agendas.
Here’s to a future where we treat all Australians like they matter.
-
Shazza August 19, 2011
“Don’t you hate it when facts get in the way of a good theory’? Absolutely agree. Which is why in the unlikey event I was invited to your house we would need to have a conversation about your endorsement of the Mindd Conference.
-
Leisa August 19, 2011
Oh, please invite me I`d love to see that conversation go down, BTW Im with you Kerryn…
-
N Abassi August 20, 2011
Kerryn yours truly .
-
mitchell August 22, 2011
top three political issue? Most people are not gay , these days most people could not give a shit that you are gay or if you get married but there are a lot more important things that are of a concern for the majority of employed and voting people of age in this country.
-
Ozboi August 23, 2011
Kerryn for PM! You’ve got my heart and soul behind that sentiment. Beautifully said. You put that misappropriated love back in her box.
-
Heather August 23, 2011
That was so well said. Thanks Kerryn – on behalf of ordinary everyday Australians who firmly believe equality of marriage is the right and proper thing to do. Let’s get on with it Australia.
-
Annie August 24, 2011
Hmmmm. I’ve raised 5 children on my own. The eldest is a full time teacher with 2 degrees. The younger 4 are all full time students with no criminal records. I’m a worker and long time volunteer. There are plenty of people out there doing ‘the right thing’ by their children. I would love to have a good partner in my life and to be able to marry her.
A christian lady said to me, ” Homosexuality goes against my religion and I can’t live with that.”
I replied, ” So does bigotry, but you seem to be managing alright.”
Good article Kerryn, thanks for all your hard work.Thought I’d share this little ditty that I sent to parliament.
40 YEARS
They told me that to marry
A husband I must choose,
And so I was a good girl and
Followed in my mothers shoes.I found myself a good man
The babies followed soon…
But so did the depression
And a deep and deadly gloom.I struggled through the years
Thinking I’m a selfish bitch,
How can you be so miserable
With a life that’s full and rich?You see underneath the surface
Was a knowledge that I feared,
Bred through years of ignorance
And the way that I was reared.I finally learnt to face the truth
it took me 40 years…
I stood against society
And I SCREAMED through all my tears.You had no right to tell me
How to live my life,
I know he was a good man,
But what I wanted… was a wife.Copyright ©2011 Annie Whitehead
-
Sarah August 24, 2011
Nice retort Kerryn. I recently read an article in ABC science which confirmed my suspicions about the way narrow-minded people think compared with those who are more liberal minded.
A recent study found that the narrow-minded people have more active amygdala’s which is part of the primitive brain, linked to the ‘fight, flight, freeze’ response, where as more open-minded people have more grey matter in the frontal cortex, which is linked to higher order thinking and tolerating complexity. I think this is very revealing! If you’re interested the link is
http://www.abc.net.au/science/articles/2011/04/08/3186006.htm -
Daphne Alaksa May 10, 2012
Just got around to reading what you wrote Kerryn. We are in complete agreement about this. What appals me is that here we are in 2012, and there are still so many people who are frightened of those who think or feel differently. As an old lady I have plenty of old-fashioned ideas but when it comes to this subject have to say that I can’t wait for the day when same-sex marriage is allowed.
