• You know what...you stupid old fart..Tony did not even know about this media stunt until it hit the media!!!...You had better get used to him, because there will be a Qld style wipeout to get rid of Gillard {officially under inverstigation} and her corrupt incompetant...union dominated govt.... - lynda
  • I respectfully disagree on the semantics you highlight. He didn't say women of calibre. He said 'women of that calibre' in reference to the subgroup he had previously identified (the onesaustrala has supported through their educational journey). Just saying. - JenDalitz
  • Spot on Tara. I wonder if hard attitudes would soften if policies were named for the children themselves with debate directed at documents called Raising Future Australians Bill, Bringing Up Baby Bill, Children Are Our Future .... It should be blindingly obvious to all, even those without children, that the health and well-being of the very young is of paramount importance. - Dianne
  • I am in 50 to 100 age bracket. Do some volunteer work in an Aged Care facility. Recently (start of April 2012) became aware of on-line petitions via GetUp and www.communityrun.org websites. Started a petition with title "IT'S TIME for Non Drug, Hemp Food Products to be Approved for Human Food Consumption in Australia" Amazed at response. More than 100 signatures first day and less than 5 weeks to achieve 1000. Petition still has about 6 months to run. www.communityrun.org/p/hfa - Anthony
  • "When a sick fourteen month-old baby needs her mum….or dad. No it’s not. There’s no contest. Sick baby wins!" "If sick baby wins", why was it ok for sick baby to wait 5 days? Mum requested on Monday... for leave on Thursday. And then when granted leave, mum spends the afternoon doing radio and television interviews. Seems more like sick baby wins when it's politically convenient. We've moved from misogyny and onto sick babies, this Parliament's new football. - Joe
  • Hey KF, more power to you and me and anyone who has to FIGHT for our loved ones who can't fight for themselves. One day at a time. Sometimes one hour at a time. Metoo- here's hoping you never have to walk a mile in our shoes- for a multitude of reasons, and my last word- I don't see it as "locking up" my aunt I see it as an honor to make sure she is safe, looked after and comfortable for the rest of her life Good luck to everyone, Robyn - Roby
  • Tara, this article is brilliant. Agree with every word. - Nicole Madigan
  • Santorini..... - Katherine Basher
  • Very moving. Everyone I know who had done this has been touched by it. - Jo
  • I have to disagree with a few things in this article. Mothers have never been better supported than they are now. 12 years ago I didn't get a baby bonus and I only got 16% childcare rebate. Now families get 50% rebate on childcare. 12 years ago there was no paid maternity leave option from the government and the paid maternity leave from my work was 6 weeks, now it's increased to 8 weeks. A colleague told me last year she took 8 weeks at half pay (over 16 weeks) and then got 18 weeks paid maternity leave from the government so she could take over 8 months off with pay. There is also paternity leave available now where I work which wasn't available 12 years ago. However I do agree with Tara Moss about Newstart. Giving single parents the Newstart allowance is pathetic and I challenge any politician to try and live on it for 6 months and pay a mortgage or rent and see how they survive. We also still have a long way to go on gender equality when it comes to pay scales but hopefully with more women in the workforce it will help the cause. - Not That Bad
 
Categories:  Must see, Spicer's Spotlight

DYING FOR A METAPHOR

“Fighting cancer”.

We see or hear these words every day.

Former England cricket captain Tony Greig used them to describe his diagnosis: “Vivian (his wife) and I are going to put the boxing gloves on and fight this like we’ve never fought anything before.”

Fellow commentator Ian Healy said, “It’s terrible, but one thing he is though, is tough”, in a News Ltd. article describing Greig’s “battle”.

 

Former cricketer, Tony Greig, image via newstribe.com.
 

 But are military metaphors the healthiest way to describe a diagnosis?

In 1971, US President Richard Nixon declared a “war on cancer” by boosting government funding for research; more than forty years later President Barack Obama committed to “waging a war against cancer as aggressive as the war cancer wages against us”.

While few would argue against a financial fight, scientists question the language labelling the illness. They say it sets up a false expectation within the patient – and society.

“A war is by its nature a time-limited event, in which there’s a defined end point. If we’re still fighting for 40 years, then that implies failure,” medical oncologist and cancer epidemiologist Dr. Alfred Neugut told marketplace.org

As Sally Gritten wrote in her moving article, Living with Cancer, Fighting the Cliches, “People have told me how ‘brave’ I am. Does that mean the ones who died should have ‘put up a better fight’? Could they have ‘faced down the enemy’? If they died, did that mean the disease ‘won’ and they ‘lost’?”

When Mum was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer 13 years ago she said, “I will beat this bloody thing”.

She visualised the healthy cells smashing the cancerous ones. In her mind, the battle-lines were drawn; she would emerge victorious.

But the cancer was terminal. The doctors gave her seven months. She died on deadline.

In the end, Mum couldn’t believe she had “lost” her “battle”. She was a strong woman, winning workplace “wars” with aplomb, how could she come out second best in the “fight of her life”?

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21 Responses to this article

  1. Polyquats October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    I think war is a pretty poor metaphor for anything, really. But as a cancer survivor and a chemist, I have two pet hate uses for war metaphors. The one described above, for any life-threatening illness, including cancer, because it is brutal and insensitive. And for describing chemical reactions, because it is just dumb and useless.

     
  2. Susan Handes October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Thanks so much for this article Tracey. I have been living with breast cancer since 2003, at least that was when I was initially diagnosed.

    My journey has been mostly silent because I have chosen not to have chemotherapy or radiation. I chose to have a mastectomy earlier this year and am glad I did that. I felt it wasn’t right for me before then though.

    None of the support services attract me as I am not fighting a battle. I often wonder how many people like me are out there, making similar choices. I am not brave as some have suggested. I have done my research and made my choices.

     
  3. Jas October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Tracey, thanks for putting into words what I often think. I have started to cringe every time I hear the phrase ‘battle with cancer’. It does imply that those who succumb didn’t fight hard enough or didn’t have the mental willpower. Some cancers are just too virulent and too advanced. The most advanced treatments and the highest self-belief still won’t make a difference to the outcome. However, for those whose cancer if treatable, the legacy of a healthier lifestyle and positive outlook is invaluable. We all do what we can but it needs to be balanced by realism.

     
  4. jacquie October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    It also seems odd that if, after all the warlike rhetoric, the person dies, and then it’s noted as ‘ died peacefully’. At what point does the so called fighting stop and the peace replace it? Peace normally happens when the parties at war agree on something that they are both happy with doesn’t it?

     
  5. Mary Longford October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Oh Tracey what a wonderful article. The war metaphor has troubled me too. Dad died of cancer and I hated it when someone said “well he put up a good fight”. It somehow trivialised it. I HATE hearing “they have started the battle of their life”. One thing I absolutely hate is talent shows when hosts says “here they are singing for their life”. That really gives me the you know whats!! It’s a bloody talent show. To say such a thing is so disrespectful. So glad you wrote this . Mary

     
  6. R.A.FELDMAN October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    When I was diagnosed late and wrongly with bowel cancer I was, needless to say devastated but then was told it was actually ovarian cancer. I was a total woos all the way through, crying all the way down to the operating room. I started my first course of chemo & being a devout coward was full of angst and resentment as to why I was there. I never thought of it as a battle as I don’t think WE fight the beast, the drugs do. I was in remission for 3 months, never really feeling 100% right then started an 18 weekly dose of chemo losing my hair etc. I am in remission again and by the way had a port put in so the chemo could be done through it. No more finding veins. What a relief. I am coming up to being 80 & I suppose just have to tackle it as it eventuates itself again and again. I think all the nurses in Hoac are amazing. They all deserve OBEs, not flippin’ rock stars and such like. And the people behind the scenes who invent gadgets to make the nurses and our lives easier, God bless them.

     
  7. vanessay October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    What really annoys me about the cancer “fight” battle etc is that it is a middle class battle, if you live where I live (Adelaide Hills) the cost of scans x-rays etc at the local private medical imaging service is prohibitive to many families the gaps being sometimes double or triple the rebate from Medicare. Around here we save up for medical imaging.

     
  8. Cat October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Yes I detest this language. My Mother died 6 years ago from a rare and aggressive cancer and I’ve worked for a national cancer charity where this language is so embedded that I received looks of shock and disappointment when I expressed my frustration at this destructive metaphor. The psychology behind it is understandable – it provides a sense of control over something that is essentially totally out of our control. The absence of any other language around cancer meant that my mother and I never had any conversations about death or what her death would mean for us all. Living with her absence now, failing to look past the “stay positive and fight” mantra is a regret I feel daily.

     
  9. Nat October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    I hate the fight term. I agree that it sounds like those who die from cancer could have, should have put up a bigger fight. Nothing could be further from the truth.

     
  10. Pam Newton October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Hate, hate, hate the hurtful use of this term and can’t wait for it to be relegated to the scrap heap.

    I feel about it much the same way I feel about the language of “miracles” which often goes hand in hand. The cruel lie that if you have enough fight or faith in you, then you’ll “win.” Meaning , of course, that if you “lose” it wasn’t the cancer that killed you but some inner spiritual lack.

    It’s not a battle FFS, it’s an illness.

     
  11. Motherhugger October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    I dislike the metaphor also. I’ve just been diagnosed with Leukaemia. I don’t feel like I’ve entered a battle. I’m living with cancer – lots of appointments, learning about treatments and doing regular day to day tasks that still need to be done, especially when you have young children. I’m trying not to take it personally. It isn’t about me being brave or a fighter or anything. It is about how aggressive the cancer is and how well my body responds to treatment. It is about what my body is doing without me. I can choose my response to the situation, and facing death is confronting, but it is part of life and we all have to do it. Whether I live or die has nothing to do with winning or losing a battle.

     
  12. Rhoda October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Yes, it’s not a war. Slogans like these are so glib and false. Heard a friend say she even disliked the fact that showing celebrities back doing their thing as though it was all over and done made her feel like a hypochondriac.

    Once someone in the family is diagnosed with cancer there is a new normal. Nothing is ever the same again. Even if treatment is successful the survivor and family always have to try and push back the fear of it coming back. There are also side effects from the treatment that might not be visible but will forever be part of their new normal.

    It’s important to be honest about it.

     
  13. Ally October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Yes, so agree with this. When one is diagnosed with cancer, it is something that is happening within your body, so how can you wage a war on yourself! Timing, acceptance, determination and kindness go a long way to dealing with it. We will all die one day, so if the path for you is this one, peace is better than war!

     
  14. Jenny October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    You have got it right. I used to wonder why I felt so irritated by the phrase “after a long/short/brave battle” in the obituary for someone who had died of their disease. I thought it was just me demonstrating lack of empathy or something. Treatment for illness is not something to be likened to war, it is more to do with cooperation and going with the flow. It is about the individual caring about and for himself, with support from those around him. Not a fight, but a commitment.

     
  15. Susan October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Each day any of us has is a bonus. The drugs may or may help. Surgery may or may help. Radiation may or may not help. All I know for sure is that anyone with a diagnosis is still here. Still able to smell the beautiful spring roses, still able to tell their loved ones important things, still able to choose which way they are going to handle this dilemma. Take professional advice, choose the things you can do and feel lucky we are still here.If we fight or battle we have to use heaps of head space that could be used for important things, like, just now.

     
  16. Tracey October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Thank you all for your wise words on this matter. It’s a shame such glib phrases are thrown about in the media so often. Perhaps we will spark a rethink.

     
  17. The Huntress October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Great article, Tracey. So much I could say, but won’t. A very thoughtful piece.

     
  18. Benison O'Reilly October 23, 2012 Reply
     
     

    I had an opinion piece published in the SMH last year on a closely related topic – the old positive attitude will beat cancer myth. Drives me nuts and, as people have alluded to earlier, it makes the poor old cancer sufferer feel guilty if they’re not upbeat enough. They have cancer FFS – I think they’re entitled to feel a little depressed.

    Ultimately it’s the type of cancer you get and how early it’s detected that decides whether you are going to survive or not. If Tony’s Greig’s lung cancer has got past the surgical cure stage I think, sadly, his ‘battle’ will be very one-sided.

     
  19. Robbie October 24, 2012 Reply
     
     

    When my husband had cancer, we spoke often of what we called “the tyranny of positive thinking”. The language of battle went hand-in-glove with the language of “stay positive”. It’s either fight rhetoric or serenity rhetoric. Both suggest that the if the patient doesn’t get better, they simply weren’t concentrating hard enough, had some failure of self-mastery. It’s why so many cancer sufferers feel not only sick, but almost guilty for being so! A doctor actually suggested we paste affirmations all over our house, “I am happy, healthy and relaxed.” No, actually I am wounded, exhausted and terrified. The effort to be upbeat is an additional burden on people who are ill. Why cannot we allow people to speak their truth? Why cannot we use the language of hope and acceptance, “I am very ill, and hoping against hope to get better.”. I think it is because in the early stages, the battle language gives people an illusion that they still have some control of the process and outcome. They don’t. The battle language also sets up a bizarre “us/them” dichotomy within a person’s own self, the “good” thinking vs the “bad” cells. We tend to view our uncooperative bodies as though they only exist to carry our brain around, and that sufficient powers of thought can fix anything (“if you dream it you can do it” is a lot of bull!). Wouldn’t it serve us better to view ourselves whole, and with compassion? When my husband passed away, he had come to a place of peace and gracious acceptance, and as his body grew weaker his spirit grew stronger and brighter every day. That was more important to me than winning any “battle”.

     
  20. helenbea October 24, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Worthwhle and relevant: Dr Brene Brown on ‘vulnerability’
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iCvmsMzlF7o
    coming from 30 years of Rheumatoid Arthritis. Not ‘terminal’ but carries its own ‘death sentence.

    Great words Tracey…put down the swords and knives. it’s all about love…that’s my take. Heal the heart.

     
  21. Jacqueline November 1, 2012 Reply
     
     

    Really interesting discussion. I too have been iritated -actually more than irritated- by the language used. When a neighbour,beautiful 24 year old expecting his first child with his lovely wife died of leukaemia before the child was born a relative who had survived an entirely different and treatable cancer said “he just seemed to give up the fight”. People like to believe that they have a lot more control over every aspect of their life than they actually do.

    I found this book articulately expressing my point …what I would of said if I could of…Smile or Die. How Positive Thinking Fooled America and the World. Barabara Ehrenreich

     

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  • lynda: You know what...you stupid old fart..Tony did not even know about this media stunt until it hit the media!!!...You had b...

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  • Dianne: Spot on Tara. I wonder if hard attitudes would soften if policies were named for the children themselves with debate dir...

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