THE DATING PROJECT #20. SMOOTH SAILING
‘Flight Eloise’ definitely took flight in the beginning, but this week finds our 50-something becoming increasingly frustrated with ‘the game’. Feeling like a scaredy cat, she backs everything off. Until a hot prospect calls to take her out on a harbour cruise…
The Dating Project follows the adventures of three women Lou Lou ( 30s), Astrid (40s) and Eloise (50s) as they navigate the tricky online dating scene. Along the way they have the support and advice of renowned sex therapist Bettina Arndt and relationship counsellor Rob Tiller. *To see the last installment – #19 Emotional Intelligence, go here.
This week we just have Eloise reporting in. Lou Lou is in New York but will be bringing us up to speed with her adventures next week.
From Eloise comes a classic internet dating story. She started off down in the dumps, fed up with the same old same olds popping up on her RSVP searches, not an appealing profile to be seen. Well, there was one who had her panting but sure enough, he promptly disappeared. But by the end of the week there was a burst of activity and she may just pull off a sail around the harbour with the latest prospect.
These ups and downs happen all the time. Just when you are ready to throw the whole thing in, you take another look and suddenly there are some exciting possibilities. It’s a lesson for all impatient internet daters. Seek and ye shall find – eventually.
So here’s Eloise…
It’s a bit quiet on the RSVP front and I am experiencing a slight case of despondency! I have a confession to make; I feel very disheartened as I look at endless photos of the ‘over 50’s’ men!
Yes, I know Bettina and Rob have cautioned us not to be put off by men’s photos as they usually don’t do them justice. I have heeded this advice, otherwise RSVP Flight Eloise would never have taken off! I just yearn for that spark of “Oooh he looks a bit sexy”.
I’ve also experienced a few frustrating dead-ends. I usually kiss first, and if there is interest then email. But I spotted a man whose photo shivered my timbers and actually looked a bit sexy. Whoa Eloise! But that’s not all, his profile mentioned my favourite music and he played the guitar!
Yes, yes, yes!
His profile was peppered with literary references, wit, intelligence and warmth. Hey, I thought, this is more like it. So I emailed what I believe to be a fitting email in response. Not too gushy, hinting that I got his subtle, amusing literary influences and even chucked in MY all time favourite Jimi Hendrix performance.
I waited with anticipation, which I have not felt on RSVP before. Alas, a week later I get an odd message in my mailbox, “XXXX emailed you. Hidden. Profile inactive.” OMG…he replied, but I can’t read the reply and suddenly his profile is down??? Has he misbehaved? Met his Ms Right?
Let the mind games begin! Is Eloise playing it right?
Typical. The ones you are really interested in are the ones who don’t respond! And the bait on the hooks sent to me doesn’t quite appeal. Grrrrrr. Maybe I was too gushy? As my mother always said, “Play it cool.” If only I’d listened.
Last Saturday night, home alone and a bit bored, I was browsing RSVP and a ‘chat’ message dinged. It was from a 36 year old, very good looking guy! Oh c’mon, I thought, why the hell would he be contacting an old dame like me? I’d never done the chat thing so I thought I would chat back. I was in a mischievous mood and had more than an inkling of what he may be after. This is an edited version.
Me: Why would you want to meet a woman my age?
Him: Why, don’t you like younger men? I would keep it a secret.
Me: Honey, if I met a younger man I wouldn’t be keeping it a secret!
Him: Are you a Diamonds and Furs kind of woman?
Me: I’m certainly not a Plastic and Rags kinda girl.
Him: Would you like to be my spoilt mistress?
Me: Not sure. Never been one before. What does that mean?
He then blithered on for a while about going out to shows, dinner blah blah blah…then
Him: Would you like a good time?
Me: What do you mean good time? A good time for me, might mean something completely different for you.
I was determined to make him be spell it out. To own up to what he really wanted.
|Page 1 of 2||next >>|