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FASHION WEEK WITH MRS WOOG

The change of season is upon our doorstep, and my Snuggie is being dusted off for evenings by the fire. I thought it might be apt to share a little research I have done lately to celebrate Mercedes Benz Fashion Week, which starts next week.

So hitch up your britches ladies, and grab a notebook and pen. Because you are going to want to know about these terms before you update your wardrobes for Winter, or if you are a fashion wanker, you will recognize this period as AW/13.

Which means Autumn Winter 13. Ready? Let us begin.

graphic-pantsGraphic Pants

Shops all over the country are stocking up on graphic pants. Now before we go any further, be rest assured that these pants are not going to contain any images that wearers may find disturbing, nor will they contain strong, coarse language.

They are simply pants that have a pattern on them.

They are suitable for all audiences, particularly those members who do not enjoy nutrition, as the pattern may stretch beyond recognition if you carry any fat. Particularly if you have a bootylicious butt.

If you own such a butt, wear a dress over it. A neon dress.

And an owl beanie.

 


pittonesie

The Onesie

This nifty garment can take you from the cradle to the grave, now that they have seamlessly transferred from baby talk to cat walk. Case in point, a certain Mr Brad Pitt, who was currently spied on a family outing rocking a black Bonds Wondersuit.

I can see the appeal of The Onesie. No need for undies but much need for a doona.

 

 

 

baroque

Baroque

The baroque trend has been around forever. Since 1600 in fact!

Think stiff lace and linens, high waists encased in whalebone corsets and large billowy sleeves.

Perfect and practical for a night out on the tiles, or for nipping down to Medicare to claim your rebate.

 

 

 

sushiNouvelle Japonisme

Holy Hooplarians! I do declare that I got a little hot and flustered when I first came across this style trend. I mean, is that really even a word? And if so, how does one pronounce it?

The fash pack are totally stoked that Nouvelle Japanisme has finally come to the forefront of fashion. And because I don’t want to look totally stupid, I need to know both how to pronounce it and what it means, before I brush shoulders with that intimidating bunch next week.

Nouvelle is French for new. Pronounced NOOVEL. Japonisme is French for Influenced by Japan. Pronounced JAPONIZM.

NOOVEL JAPONIZM. Sorted. Still would not know what it was even if it whacked me over the head with a samurai sword.

 

neon-peplumsPastel / Neon

Colours that are polar opposites, yet interestingly, both are considered “on trend”.

It is things like this that confuses me about fashion.

That, and peplums, which sounds more like a gynecological instrument, rather than a flap of fabric designed to hide a large lunch.

 

animal-print

 

Animal Print

Never goes away. NEXT.

 

 

 

 

 

stevie-nicksGothic Romance

Pashing Vampires? Fornicating Fangsmiths? No, silly! *eye roll*

According the fashion pundits at Westfield, this trend is best described as:

“a heavenly mix of lace, velvet, leather and romantic shades. Think dark, think enchanting, and think seductive. Create this winter trend with maroons and gold and an injection of edge.”

If you require a clearer indication of this trend, imagine a love child of Freddie Mercury and Stevie Nicks.

 

leather-and-studsLeather & Studs

Take inspiration from the local chapter of your friendly Hell’s Angels or Rebels Club. Armed with your notebook, ask them from where they draw their style inspiration. What is the best way to combine textures, tattoos and colour?

These guys are very fashion forward when it comes to concealment as well. And I am not talking about dark under eye shadows and blemishes.

Thank them for their time, and exit slowly, making no sudden movements.

 

laura-ashleyFloral

Remember Laura Ashley and Liberty Prints? Well THAT is floral, my fashion loving friends.

Don’t rush out to buy any. You already have it from the 60s, the 70s, the 80s, the 90s and the noughties.

 

In Conclusion…

You are already trendy.

You have something from all of these categories I am sure, apart from maybe the Onesie.

But if you do buy a Onesie this Winter, the only thing you will need to consider is which trend will it be inspired by.

For me? The answer is obvious.

I never saw a Studded Gothically Romanced Onesie with a Floral Peplum I didn’t like.

 

What is on your fashion shopping list this season?

Has fashion come so far full circle that it’s now eating itself?

 

 

MORE STORIES BY MRS WOOG

Mrs Woog’s Anger Management

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Mrs Woog. Not Drowning, Waving…

 

mrs woog*About Mrs Woog: “I can be found in the laundry, folding laundry, sorting laundry and dropping off the dry cleaning. I am mum to two boys, boss of my husband and master of a cat and two guinea pigs. Come nightfall, I watch TV while tweeting which drives Mr Woog insane. I like to read cookbooks and eat out. During my waking hours I ferry kids around in the Mazda while drinking takeaway coffees and listening to talkback. I think about going to the gym every day. I used to work in the publishing industry before I realised it was nothing like Elaine Benes from Seinfeld made out like it was. Now I write this blog. And I never get writer’s block. It is a gift I have.” You can follow me on Twitter: @Woogsworld.

 

 

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33 Comments

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Something Gorgeous

    Brilliant Mrs Woog, brilliant

    • Reply April 4, 2013

      Mrs Woog

      I hope it was helpful x

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Sascha

    Not sure what Brad was thinking with the playsuit. What with his Chanel ads and all, it’s been a big year. Onsies are so popular with teenage girls right at this minute. Not influenced by Brad I imagine.

    Personally I gave up on trying to be fashionable a long time ago. Comfort is key now.

    By the way where are the credits for the images used? Love to know where the animal print one came from.

    • Reply April 4, 2013

      Adele

      It’s Katharine Hepburn in the movie Bringing Up Baby.

  • My cut off for the onesie has always been 2 years (and that is at nighttime). Sometimes I see trends at the start of a season that I think I won’t like or wear but then I do and they become a normal part of my wardrobe. I am struggling to find anything remotely pleasing to the eye or any other part of me when it comes to the onesie on an adult. If even Brad Pitt looks naff the rest of us don’t stand a chance.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Jo

    And if said Studded Gothically Romanced Onesie with a Floral Peplum is made in Japan you pretty much have all those bases covered…

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Annabel Candy, Get In the Hot Spot

    I think I will get a faux fur zebra print onesie – as long as it has press studs and a flap on the back to make bathroom visits easier…. my post childbirth bladder isn’t what it used to be so that’s a worry….

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Rhoda

    Really love those graphic pants but a perfect figure is required (sigh)

    The onsie is naff for sure. Probably take off like a rocket LOL

    If you’re looking back for inspiration than the forties era has all you need. Makes any woman look glam. They really got it together with the hair, makeup, clothes, shoes, the lot.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Kate

    My onesie will be nouvelle japonisme in style. I will eat sushi in it at my local food court and the people will marvel.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Joan Woolley

    Love the Peplum it hides a multitude of what you don’t want on show , pretty and feminine.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Adele

    Thank you!

    I won’t be getting a onesie, even as pyjamas. It would mean getting completely undressed (in the coming winter) to have a midnight pee!

    But Goth Romantic – yep, I can do that.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Chris

    When the time arrives for elastic waists, then you know not to bother any more! Wonderful article.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    anicasunny

    Funny, thanks for the tips!

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Lisa

    I love this Mrs woog I won’t be buying a onesie I pee too much at night and i watched a disturbing episode of my secret addiction on gem where a big man had one on it turned me off for life! As for the printed pants I must be very trendy as I have 3 pairs,I know I know fashionable me.no gothic looks either or whatevs that trend is called,I like animal print and florals though just not too many,Thankyou for your take on fashion,I might get me a snuggie too.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Nicole

    You are a very funny lady Mrs Woog… thanks for the laughs

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    ro.watson

    I like design idea of a straight(no frills) flap ,back and front, with openings at side~ possibly in a tunic but with more, like pants underneath. Having lived through overall period, I reckon those onesies pose too great a challenge in a toilet setting.

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Gracie123

    You must wear your leopard skin onesie(skintight) with shaped stiff peplum over the butt, to make it look bigger, when you display yourself draped over Mercedes Benz at the motor Shows. (just read that article). Zip down the front of the onesie, daringly lowered to show off your enhanced boobs of course. Japonisme bob and fring wig or anime wig on the head .

  • Reply April 4, 2013

    Debyl1

    Best fashion trend post ever.
    Absolutely no one can describe fashion…or anything for that matter…the way you do.x

  • Reply April 5, 2013

    Nel Matheson

    Where have you been all my fashion life, Mrs Woog. I have needed your concise and accurate guidance for years. Following trends is going to be a snap. I will now dress to excess with supreme confidence that I will cut the A list mustard. If Brad Pitt can wear a onesie in public, I can too. Thank you sooooo much.

  • Reply April 5, 2013

    helen b

    Absolutely hysterical! Loved it all and laughed through Mrs. Woog’s streamlined guide to ‘having it all’ fashion wise. The comments have all been superb and kept me laughing. Clearly, tapped into everyone’s humour.

    Just wish I hadn’t let go of those 60’s print trousers, hippie flower power gear!

    The onesie??? Reminds me of the one-piece culotte ‘suits’ everyone was into in the late 60’s! Hell to get out of for the loo! As so many have stated.

    Maybe the onesie should be called the ‘dress down tradesperson’s boiler suit’. In the grey, definitely aligned with the ideals of communism, as we’ve seen in the world up to now – one size/colour fits all. Maybe our pollies could adopt this for public office. Then, maybe, no more bitching about the way our women pollies dress!

    Thankyou Mrs Woog and everyone for your hilarious takes on creative ‘wardrobes’.

  • Reply April 5, 2013

    April

    Beware of the onesie and toilet visits. A lady of my aquaintance… and advancing years… wore such a garment in Asia and found herself removing all of said garment and balancing precariously in a communal squat facility, much to her embarrassment and the amusement of the other users.

  • Reply April 5, 2013

    Adrienne

    Thank you Mrs Woog, you are hilarious. Laughed and laughed. Can you write one of these every season so I can be fashion fabulous AND entertained? Please.

  • Reply April 6, 2013

    Sandra

    Now that, is my kinda fashion blog! Thanks Mes Woog. #MuchEnlightened

  • Reply April 6, 2013

    Vicky

    You slay me Mrs Woog!
    Laying in bed reading this, laughing. My partner asks me what I’m laughing at. I just had to reply don’t worry. You won’t get it.

  • Reply April 9, 2013

    Melbourne Hair Salon

    I like this post,a best fashion trend post.The way you describe fashion,no one else can do.Also a wonderful article.

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  • Reply April 10, 2013

    Tamara

    have just emailed this article to all and sundry!! .
    just beautiful.

    Can you consider giving up the laundry for a job at my office so I can chortle all day!

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  • Reply May 24, 2013

    A FACE WELL LIVED

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  • Reply August 29, 2013

    Susan

    I know, I know, winter is nearly over, but I am always behind (pardon the pun) with my fashion wardrobe. Given that I live on the governments generous pension, I am now reduced to shopping for my glam at op shops. My latest desire is the printed pants but they have not yet reached the op shops! Mrs Woog I love your fashion blog – best on the net. Can you do one specifically for pensioners who shop at op shops please? I have noticed the term “onesie” a lot lately in books, but thought it was only babies wearing them. How shocked I was to see the decidedly recently shabby Mr. Pitt sporting this dreadful look. I do hope King Gee and Bonds are getting royalties. Mr P can certainly afford to give them some credit.

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